Hell. Handbasket. Two Tickets, Please.

I am a BIG believer in Karma — put it out there, you'll get it back and all that jazz — whatever, it's just a simple way of keeping my good vs. less than gooder side in check.

Unless, it's April Fool's Day and, well, then, all bets are off.

ME:  Uh, we got about 4 inches of snow last night, but schools haven't called, so you might want to change into something a little warmer.

17 yo:  Are you kidding me?!?

15 yo:  You mean, I shaved my legs for nothing?!?

ME:  Yes, I'm kidding.

15 yo:  PHEW!

17 yo:  You mean, there's no school?

ME:  No, I mean it didn't really snow last night!!!

[eyes go wide]

HAH, APRIL FOOLS!!!!!

Snort. Cough. Wipes eyes.

Now, I totally understand how those with younger children would probably not think this to be very funny.

I merely considered pulling this same gag on my two youngest, for a fleeting moment, but thought better of it, for fear of being thrown into a whole other sort of purgatory and, trust me, you don't want any of that.

Also, wouldn't have worked as well with those of you living in an area where, you know, it's actually snowing.

GARTH (NOT HIS REAL NAME):  You might want to warm your car up, it's snowing.

[eyes go wide]

If, however, you have teenagers, Garth (not his real name) or I will be more than happy to save you a seat!

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

Comments

119 responses to “Hell. Handbasket. Two Tickets, Please.”

  1. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  2. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  3. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  4. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  5. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  6. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  7. ascapecodturns Avatar

    It is spring, right? Need. Warm. Weather.

  8. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  9. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  10. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  11. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  12. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  13. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  14. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Yeah, I hear it's snowing by you, too, but mostly we have sleet here on the coast in Jersey.  Either way, YUCK!

  15. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  16. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  17. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  18. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  19. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  20. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  21. Jenn Avatar

    *snort* I love you so much for doing this!
    I am WAY too afraid of my teen boys to attempt anything like that. I did get my 9 yr old (10 tomorrow EEEEK) with the old “You have something huge and ugly on your forehead. What IS that?!” Causing her to jump out of bed to look. But she laughed. The boys? I’d be in fear for my life. Though, I did consider trying to mess with da-hubs, Clint (totally his real name) with a fake pregnancy FB post. But it wouldn’t be funny when he never came back home. And? I did that once just under 11 years ago and well…joke was on me! (We named her Gabby.)

  22. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  23. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  24. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  25. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  26. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  27. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  28. Melisa Avatar

    Two seats, please! thanks! haha

  29. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  30. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  31. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  32. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  33. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  34. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  35. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    SNORT!!!  Wow, Gabby's turns 10, tomorrow?!?!  Time flies when you're having fun playing practical jokes, huh?  Happy Birthday!!!

  36. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  37. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  38. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  39. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  40. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  41. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  42. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Smoking or non-smoking?

  43. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  44. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  45. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  46. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  47. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  48. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  49. Melisa Avatar

    Non-smoking, extra leg room!

  50. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  51. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  52. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  53. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  54. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  55. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  56. Headless Mom Avatar

    Crap. Gabby is 10? That means my baby isn’t far behind.
    What I totally meant to say is that I HATE April Fool’s Day. I’m not much of a jokester. Thank goodness that my kids inherited that from me.

  57. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  58. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  59. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  60. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  61. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  62. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  63. Tara R Avatar

    I’m still trying to come up with a good prank for my son. He’s sneaky, so it has to be really good. Love that your daughter was more concerned about her gratuitous leg shaving.

  64. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  65. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  66. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  67. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  68. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  69. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  70. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Her expression was sooo worth it, Tara!!!

  71. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  72. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  73. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  74. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  75. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  76. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  77. Heather Avatar

    hahahahhaha This is CLASSIC.

  78. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  79. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  80. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  81. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  82. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  83. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  84. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    See, now, somehow I knew that you would think this was funny, Heather 😉
    Hugs,
    Liz

  85. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  86. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  87. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  88. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  89. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  90. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  91. Robyn Wright Avatar

    ROFL I love that she said you mean I shaved my legs for nothing!!!!

  92. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  93. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  94. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  95. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  96. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  97. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  98. SurprisedMom Avatar

    Know the hell. See the handbasket. Got the tickets.
    However, I have to agree, “You mean I shaved my legs for nothing,” got me chortling, heavily.

  99. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  100. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  101. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  102. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  103. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  104. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  105. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Aaaand, she may or may not have heard that from her mother 😉 HUGS!!!

  106. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  107. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  108. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  109. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  110. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  111. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  112. patois Avatar

    I’m impressed she shaves! I almost remember what that was like.

  113. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁

  114. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁

  115. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁

  116. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁

  117. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁

  118. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁

  119. Liz@thisfullhouse Avatar

    Heh, me too 🙁