Loooong before I had kids and waaaaay before automated teller machines — although, it's kinda weird to call ATM's that, since they don't give out lollipops OR dog bones — I was the senior customer service representative for a large manufacturing company.
Before that, I was the secretary to the plant manager, as well as various vice presidents and a couple of marketing and district sales managers in their corporate offices.
Then, the owner was indicted (long story, I hear he pretends he's Elvis now) and, well, I got another job as a, you guessed it, a customer service representative.
However, this time, for a rather large manufacturer of toilets.
So, yeah, I have a lot of experience, dealing with customers and their crap, at an executive level.
I empathize with anyone working in a service-based capacity, whenever dealing directly with the public, because, well, people suck.
Unless, I happen to be the customer.
[eyes go wide]
I took my 17yo shopping last night [shiver] because, the house magically disappeared the ONLY two pairs of jeans that fit and, well, yes, the cashier was probably all like, "UGH, I just want to go home," too!
Then again, I can't think of ANYTHING else I would rather NOT be doing, than shopping, at 6:00 p.m., on Sunday night, can you?!?
"We're NEVER going home, you know that, right?!?"
At first, I thought she was talking to me and I was going to answer her (because, I'm nice like that) but, she was actually talking to the other cashier, who was already checking out the ONLY OTHER person on line.
[popping her gum]
"I know, right?!?"
I am NOT even kidding! She really DID say that, right in front of me, THE CUSTOMER, while pop-pop-popping her gum and…really?!?
[rolls eyes]
"I don't know HOW you guys put up with these people ALL day?!?"
Again, not directed towards me, THE CUSTOMER, honestly, I was kind of tired and, you know, still sort of confused.
"Is there a problem?!?"
[sound of crickets]
I turned to ask the person behind me if I had magically turned invisible and, well, there was no one there to ask, as I was THE ONLY CUSTOMER BEING CHECKED OUT AT THE TIME.
"Geez, are they EVER going to make the announcement?!?"
Honestly, I was all, like and, not for nothing, but if I had EVER talked like that, in front of customer, I would have been fired, three times over!
"What announcement?!?"
Good, the other cashier was all, like (see face above.)
[popping gum]
"You know, that the store is closing?!?"
[one beat, two beats]
My turn.
"Oh, you didn't hear it?!?"
THAT got both their attentions.
"They made that announcement about a half an hour ago."
She tossed me my bag, mumbled something about it being about time and started closing out the sales in her cash register.
"Have a nicccccccccce night."
She said, like a blood-engorged snake.
[whispering]
"But, I didn't hear any announcement, either, mom?!?"
Actually, there wasn't. She had another 30 minutes to go.
"Thank you and g'night!"
I grabbed my daughter's arm, mumbled something about it NOT being my problem the girl doesn't know enough to wear a watch, or check to see what time it is.
What?!? Blame me for being old-ish, if you must. But, the kid needed jeans, otherwise I would have totally left the stuff right there on her counter, without even paying.
You got a problem wit dat, Skippy?!?
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