This Full House Archive

Category: Sick Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down

  • If You Give a Momblogger a Digital Camera: A Study in Black and White

    [Yes, I am STILL Soliciting Comments for Charity:  Okay, so I'm BLOGGING OUT HUNGER and totally willing to beg for someone
    else's food, this week – I know I'm no Dooce, but won't you consider
    helping reach my goal of 300 comments, for charity, even for a Dork,
    like me?]

    ———————————————————————-

    It finally started to snow here in Jersey, just the other day — I know, my Seattle and Midwest friends have plenty that they are probably more than willing to share, even — and, since Santa Claus didn't bring me the really cool camera I've been wanting (honestly, I was happy he remembered the kids) look what I did with a little Envy:

    Cabin-fever

    Cabin Fever:  On the first day of Christmas vacation, it started to really snow and
    Thing Two thought it sucked that it happened, smack dab in the middle of her recovery and I (seeing as, I am the meanest mom in the world) wouldn't let her go outside…dammit!

    Garden-fairy
     
    Garden Fairy:  As she screams, "It's frickin' freezing out here, Mr. Bigglesworth!"

    Pointer-dog

    He's A Little Bit Pointer, Dog:  Pointing out the fact that he looks way better in the down vest, that my mother gave me last Christmas, than I do…dammit!

    Smile-doofus-dog

    Smile Doofus-Dog:  I swear, he's a REAL camera hound!

    Worlds-largest-snowball
    World's Largest Snowball:  Actually, it's snow-encrusted basketball…but, you won't tell anyone…right!?!?

    Sit-doofus-sit

    Sit Doofus, Sit:  He actually thinks Thing One's gonna throw it!?!?

    Wii-love-the-snow

    Wii Love the Snow…NOT:  Don't worry (The Boy announced he hates snow since, you know, we got the Wii) with the magic of Picnik.com, mommy can make it snow anytime, anywhere, too!

    Imagine, what I could do with a REAL grown up camera!?!?

    [shudder]

    I blame Ashton Kutcher, who truly makes digital photography look cool (and pretty) even for a dork, like me.

    [heavy sigh]

    Ah well, thank goodness for Flickr!

    My-signature

    © 2008 This Full House – All Rights Reserved.

    ——————————————————————–

    This is where I pimp my stuff:  I run a column at the Imperfect Parent (I don't know how that happened, either) this month, I'm talking about the value of Mini-Sleepovers.  Oh, and fresh from the garden state, read how I'm raising teenagers with my eyes wide shut.  Also, do you hate food shopping?  EXCELLENT!  Me, too. But, I recently received an electronic grocery list organizer that is fun AND practical.  Want one?

  • The Christmas Picture That Almost Wasn’t

    Thing-two-and-mama-thanksgiving 

    I took this picture of Thing Two (she's my middle girl) and my mom (that's my youngest, Mini-me, popping up, on cue, from behind the couch) at my brother's house on Thanksgiving Day.  It's not a very good one (seriously, I could really use a new camera, Santa!) but, you can still see the family resemblance…right?

    This year, I really enjoyed giving up on any plans I had for hosting our family dinner (seriously, I highly recommend it) and not for the lack of wanting (I love Thanksgiving) but, things have been a little stressful at our house, lately.

    I know, you too, right?

    My husband, Garth (not his real name) works in the banking industry ('nuf said) and then my middle girl goes and blows a gasket (genetic disorders be damned) so, luck hasn't been on our side this year and, truth be told, I'm more than a little nervous about my mother's heart procedure, next week.

    Oh, did I mention that Thing Two is scheduled for her surgery, the following week, 13 days before her 13th birthday!?!?

    (more…)

  • Parenting Tip# 13,013: Wear Your Babies Well and They Will Try Their Best to Wear You Out, too!

    Thing-Two-Halloween-2008

    Biker Chick – Halloween 2008

    This is Thing Two — she's my middle girl — and, exactly 3 days, 9 hours and 15 minutes after Christmas, my colicky, sleep deprived and extremely gastrointestinally-challenged baby girl will turn 13-years-old.

    Though, I'm no longer a virgin — my oldest girl turned 15, this month — I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that my husband, Garth (not his real name) and I will have another teenager running around the house and (in the not too distant future) 2 more will follow.

    Today, however, her father and I are getting ready to rip Thing Two a new one!

    (more…)

  • Cake or Death?

    Daddy_2

    It’s been a really difficult week for my husband, Garth (not his real name) what, with all the banking bru-ha-ha of late and STILL trying really hard to reassure his customers that everything is, you know, fine.  Then, driving into work one morning and hearing on the radio that he…um…works for someone else.

    Niiiiice.

    Then, his uncle was hospitalized and Garth (not his real name) stopped by the soccer fields on Monday, to switch cars with me (mine is better at highway speeds and doesn’t rattle as much, like his) so, he could take my MIL up to see her brother, perhaps for the last time, which was a good thing.

    [takes deep breath]

    Because, he was moved into Hospice on Wednesday and has been pretty much unconscious since then.

    Yesterday, Uncle Jimmy lost his battle with THE BITCH that is Cancer and we spent most of last night figuring out the best way to tell the kids.

    Garth (not his real name) thought it would be best to wait until the morning and that’s when my Hungarian kicked in and I was all, like, break out the wine and let’s talk about death, baby!

    (more…)

  • “I Hate You” – It’s totally personal!

    My husband had to work this weekend, so I spent the majority of Saturday sitting on the sidelines and watching my kids play soccer – not to mention, counting my blessings, thankful that my two oldest, you know, don’t play – and, when Mini-me was through, I dragged my chair over to the other side of the soccer fields to watch the second-half of The Boy’s game.

    "I’m going to kick your ass!"

    [eyes go wide]

    My head whipped around, so fast, and – judging by the look of the OTHER mom’s face –  I’m pretty sure that my voice may have changed from the force!

    "WHAT DID HE JUST SAY!?!?"

    [nodding head]

    "He just told your son that he was going to kick his ass."

    That’s what I thought he said.

    "Hey, Number-Eleventy…the mouth…there’s no ass-kicking in soccer!"

    Later, I come to find out that my kid wasn’t the only one being picked on – most of the defensive players were being, you know, offensive – and that Number-Eleventy was pretty much used to talking trash on the baseball field AND basketball court, as well.

    "Remember, in one ear and out the other!"

    Our team’s coach did a really good job of addressing the unsportsman-like behavior exhibited on the field (the entire game, I hear) however, The Boy took it to heart and I can’t say as I blame him, either.

    "I hate you!"

    Because, this weekend is the first time that my 9-year-old son said he hated me and…STILL…it’s tearing me apart.

    (more…)

  • Parenting Tip #19,201,733: When it comes to love, there is no language barrier – unless, you are family!

    [Edited to Add: I borked-up my blog and accidentally disappeared ALL comments – sorry, if I lost yours – because, I am A DORK!]

    Welcomefriends

    This is the sign that welcomes visitors to my parents house, as it sits firmly planted in between the geranium beds, next to the bird feeders and right outside their front door.

    On the surface, most people find its salutation agreeable and a few have made their inquiries as to where they, too, might find such an amusing lawn ornament.

    Looking a little deeper, and having spent the better part of the summer visiting with my family, one might perhaps understand the truth that lies underneath its whimsical tone.

    Especially, since I was the one who bought it for them.

    (more…)

  • Three things you should NEVER talk about while on a family vacation!

    Jettyathigbee_2

    Why don’t you take a long walk on a…um…oh my…but, that’s one looooong jetty!

    We just got back from spending a 4-day family getaway with Mini-me’s godparents, my parents and my Aunt Elizabeth (she’s my father’s youngest sister, who I happened to be named after, and…YES…she happens to be a lovable DORK, too) who’s visiting from Hungary for the summer.

    Yes, we are ALL still speaking to each other…sort of.

    (more…)

  • The 7 Words You Can (or) CanNOT Say in My House!

    Fullhousereviewicon_2

    George Carlin died, yesterday and – though, the man seemed to enjoy breaking the boundaries of good taste – his humor never failed to leave me speechless, or gasping for breath and nearly peeing my pants in absolute fits of laughter.  Especially, after having kids (Kegels be darned!) when I found myself empathizing with Mr. Carlin’s need to challenge conventional wisdom.

    My parents immigrated to the U.S. in 1956 and he learned English from watching old westerns on television and he soon found out that the most successful way to include himself in conversation was by extensive use of..well…curse words.

    No, Mr. Carlin’s material was definitely NOT family-friendly.  But, it was real and often times hit a very raw nerve – especially, in middle-class America and the furor over his bit about "The Seven Words You Can’t Say on Television" is legendary.

    Which, inspired me to write a parentally motivated (G) rated list of my own.

     

    (more…)

  • What Memorial Day Means To Me, Mostly.

    Starspangledminime

    Yep, it’s Monday and my youngest (she’s 6) is beside herself with worry, because our flag isn’t up (yet) and she can NOT find anything red to wear!

    Anything that’s CLEAN, anyway.

    You see, around these parts, Memorial Day is the "unofficial" start of barbecue season and, as of today, the beaches in New Jersey are now "officially" open!

    Which simply means that the lifeguards are on duty and it’s high time we ALL get our beach tags, or better make sure that those season passes are visibly displayed on the dashboard of your car, thankyouverymuch.

    This weekend is also when my twin brother and I typically celebrate our birthday (May 28) and then he joined the Army right before we graduated high school and I quickly became accustomed to being an only child.

    Until, he almost died.

    (more…)

  • New Jersey Moms Blog Launched, Today!

    Newjerseymomsblog250

    Last month, I was asked by the lovely Jill Asher (co-founder of Silicon Valley Moms Group) if I’d be interested in writing for an upcoming new sister site, for New Jersey mom bloggers.

    "Hey, you know, I’m from Jersey!"

    Well, yah…and DUH!

    Today, I am thrilled to tell you that the site has officially launched and…GUESS WHAT…I even got to write the introduction:

    (more…)