This Full House Archive

Category: Raising Teens, Tweens & Killer Dust Bunnies

  • Beware: Bitch Session in Progress – Hold my calls and mind all the empty margarita glasses.

    My mom had double-knee replacement surgery, last year (yes, it’s just as icky as it sounds) and her and dad have had one medical challenge after another, since then.

    Life goes like that, sometimes – beautiful one minute, filled with suckage the rest.

    It’s okay, though.  I sort of imagine life as a giant 50 foot female, all hopped up on too much caffeine and experiencing a bad hair day, and expect it will probably try to bite me in the ass, more than once.

    Today, most especially, she is going to be a total BITCH!

    (more…)

  • Got teens – it’s about time we had a Girl Talk, yes?

    Alot2lose

    I remember the one (and only) time I ever saw my father flat-out drunk.

    It was New Years Day in 1978 (I was 14) and we were on our way home from spending the entire night celebrating at The Hungarian Club, but my twin brother and I had to help my mother carry our father to the car, insisting that he was just too "happy" to drive.

    We carried him upstairs, sat him on the bed and tried hard NOT to burst out in a fit of giggles, as he tried to pull his turtleneck off his head and somehow managed to twist it into something resembling a straight jacket.

    We STILL laugh at that one!

    "Um…Mom…have you been drinking, again?"

    (more…)

  • Beware: Mommy on Duty – Hold my calls and mind the middle child.

    Gothgirl

    When Thing One was born, my husband and I couldn’t wait to bring her home and welcomed our new roles, as mother and father to our brand new baby daughter, celebrating each milestone of "firsts" with equal amounts of enthusiasm and trepidation.

    Then, I became pregnant with Thing Two and – though, I couldn’t wait and called my husband, at work, and gave him the results of the pregnancy test, while in the middle of a meeting with a client – I soon started to worry whether or not I was ready to separate myself from being "the world" to Thing One and having to share, well, pretty much everything, from my toes up, with TWO babies!?!

    Soon, my fears were put to rest and the mommy in me sort of just, you know, kicked into high gear and there seemed to be plenty of me to go around.

    Until, they grew up and NOW my husband Garth (not his real name) and I combine our super parental powers and it takes every bit of that strength…NOT to bite their little heads off.

    (more…)

  • PBN Blog Blast: The Truth About Motherhood – and it is the one you probably won’t want to hear, either.

    The Parent Bloggers Network is collaborating with Discovery Health to introduce their new docu-drama "Deliver Me" which follows
    three women – best friends, working mothers and physicians – as they
    balance delivering babies together in their OB/GYN practice with their
    lives outside the delivery room.

    Perhaps you’re like me – having given birth to what will probably be her last baby, 6 years ago – and asking yourself, what’s this have to do with me?

    Well, they’re looking for bloggers to tell them the truth about motherhood and I happen to have a one that just might hurt, a little.

    (more…)

  • Monday Morning Mommy Hangover

    No, I am NOT a morning person but, as long as there’s a cup of coffee handed to me
    within the first few minutes of entering the bathroom with the morning
    paper…I’m good.

    Once I finally do regain the power of speech — typically, this
    happens soon after taking a very hot shower — and after ridding
    myself of stray facial hair and morning nose…I’m better.

    Then, the kids wake up.

    This is about the time when — after careful consideration of the
    vast amount of demands that will undoubtedly be put upon me physically,
    mentally and/or emotionally that hasn’t already been compromised from
    the weekend before — I seriously think about petitioning for a:

    "National Go Back To Bed Day!"

    Instead, I’m taking Her Bad Mother’s Dare of Truthiness and revealing my true, unmade-up self to the world…on my blog…and, in the words of my 12-year-old  daughter:

    "EEP!"

    Go ahead…click on that annoying "continue reading" thingy…I DARE YOU!

    (more…)

  • This Full House Kids: The birth of a family blogging project.

    Masthead_2

    It’s a girl…a girl…a boy…and a girl!

    I am pleased to announce the birth of This Full House Kids – yep, we have added yet ANOTHER blog to our menu and I know what you’re thinking…yes, I DO…because, it’s probably the same thing that my husband, Garth (not his real name) is wondering and I ask myself, all the time, too.

    Holy Hannah Montana…WOMAN…what WERE you thinking?

    (more…)

  • Thursday Thirteen #7 – Go Slow, Tired Moms Ahead.

    Thursdaythirteenpurple

     

    There’s an interesting article in USA Today about how babies can cause "momnesia", the mental fuzziness and memory lapses that set in shortly after childbirth.

    The article goes on to give expert opinions on the subject and why some women would be reluctant to talk about their memory problems.  One that hit home, for me, was for fear of
    being judged poorly at work.

    Uh-huh.

    NOT just at work and It doesn’t go away, either.  Still.  If you’re wondering (or, worried) about the long-term effects of "momnesia," don’t sweat it.  Take it from me – nearly 15 years of working in the trenches – here are 13 reasons why I do NOT think you’re crazy.

    The Thirteen Signs That You ARE A Mom:

    (more…)

  • Don’t hate me because I’m dellusional!

    I know – keep dreamin’ – but, it’s my blog and…sometimes…totally haggard-looking, regular-type moms (like me) just want to have fun, too.

    Still, I can’t help but feel at least slightly embarrassed when I meet someone new and they innocently ask:

    "So, what DO you do, again?"

    Then, all of a sudden, being a mommy blogger doesn’t seem all that beautiful, anymore.

    (more…)

  • Body Image: A Conversation with Me, Myself and My OTHER Half.

     

    Nedadir_files_images_nedaw08_neda_3

    The key message for National Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2008 – “Be comfortable in your genes. Wear jeans that fit the TRUE you." 

    And it starts today!

    This year, my daughters and I have made a commitment to do just that – hosting the I Am Beautiful blog Tour with Woody Winfree on Valentine’s Day started us off on some pretty cool dialog – and with BlogHer launching the A Letter to my Body initiative, I can’t help but get fired-up about discussing body image.

    You see, we should ALL love our bodies!

    [feels tap on shoulder]

    "Uh, self?  Can we talk?"

    (more…)

  • 30 Tiny Moments – Day 2: Times when I just can’t see the Doofus, for the trees.

    Doofusfromthetrees

     

     

    There was a time – not so long ago, really – when I enjoyed sleep (I mean, actually slept) and it took every bit of strength – whatever I had left from the day before – just to get up in the morning.  I mean, just the thought of having to stand, erect, was enough to make me want to jump right back into bed and pull the covers over my head.

    Sounds good, yes?

    Yet, one of the few things that helped see me through was that, one day – once all of  my children were in school and I was home alone – perhaps, I would miss all the chaos .

    Surprisingly enough, I don’t!

    (more…)