Category: Raising Teens, Tweens & Killer Dust Bunnies

  • Change is Good, Failing is Better

    Hope and glen at mama and papas

    I took this picture of Hope and Glen (my two youngest) in 2005 — the year my parents moved out of the house I grew up in — and, already, my son was very protective of his baby sister.

    "I don't want her to fall in da wah-der!"

    Didn't matter that my father's koi pond was only about ankle-deep; in true Thompson fashion, my son is a born worrier (he gets that from his father) and, well, his concern for the physical and emotional well-being of everyone around him was sort of, you know, cute.

    Last night, however, turned chronic.

    "I can't make ANYONE happy."

    5 years have passed (I know, wasn't it just yesterday I was blogging about his peeing on a tree?) and, although the stories are pretty much the same (only, with less pee) I find myself feeling as if we BOTH haven't learned a gosh-darned thing.

    "I don't understand?"

    You see, my 11 year-old son is entering middle school next year and long story short (you're welcome!) let's just say the boy is feeling a little stressed.

    "My teacher, you and dad, are ALL pushing me!"

    Okay, A LOT STRESSED.

    "To do what?"

    Seriously, the kid was blowing snot and — although, my husband and I had already had a talk with his teacher and discussed her concerns over his penchant for day dreaming — he's been carrying and A/B average and I was at a loss as to why he was SO upset.

    "I'm going to fail."

    Oh. I know this one.  In fact, 5 years ago, during my middle girl's parent-teacher conference, I was the ONLY parent to cheer when her 3rd grade teacher told me that she had failed her 1st math test.

    "It's about time the kid learns to fail, something!"

    Her teacher agreed, btw.

    "All your father and I care about is that you do your best."

    Apparently, my son's teacher feels differently.

    "She said I was going to get absolutely lost in Middle School!"

    Look, I get it.  I couldn't do what she does — teach, someone else's kid, I mean — however, I know my son and — although, I think, having our kids attend K-3, switch to another school for grades 4 and 5, and then again to the middle school, our school system hasn't helped to make it ANY easier — this time, I believe the change will do him good.

    "I think you're going to be just fine."

    For the next 3 years, anyway.

    "Just ask Holly and Heather!"

    My 2 oldest daughters have already given him a run down of all the cool teachers and the, you know, not so cool teachers he'll probably get…in middle school.

    "What are you doing, Hope?"

    My youngest daughter (she's 8) ran out of the room to grab a pen and piece of paper.

    "I want to write a letter to the principal of my new school…"

    She's graduating 3rd grade next month and is changing schools, too, OY!

    "…and I want to tell her that I want Holly's and Heather's teachers, ONLY!"

    If ONLY life was that easy, right?

    "Don't worry, Hopey, I already told her AND the nurse that my youngest sister is coming!"

    Hope and Glen
    You see, some things NEVER change AND my son happens to know that his baby sister is a frequent flyer!

    "The nurse's office has got PLENTY of band aids!"

    Hope, however, rolls like her mother.

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House

  • The Day I Quit Being the Good Wife

    One of the ladies at the gym watches The Good Wife and keeps insisting that I would probably love it, too.

    "I dunno."

    You see, besides feeling as if I couldn't possibly relate to anything using the words "good" and "wife" in the same sentence ("big" and "dork," probably) I also have commitment issues with television. 

    "What time is it on?"

    By the time I get home from work, eat and get the kids settled for the night (i.e. get them to at least admit that, you know, it IS bedtime) it's too late.

    "Did you watch, last night?"

    [slaps forehead]

    "D'oh, I forgot it was on."

    Actually, I was probably too busy inspecting the inside of my eyelids and/or fighting Doofus-Dawg for the couch.

    "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but…"

    This week, however, I learned that work won't be as much of an issue, anymore.  In fact,  my schedule is about to lighten up, considerably, from 6 months ago.

    "…the owner has decided to close up shop, at the end of the month."

    Everyone in my family has made sacrifices (trust me, they will ALL tell you, I'm sure) and, well, it will be nice NOT to have to worry about feeling guilty, sort of.

    "I'm really, really, sorry."

    Long story, short (you're welcome) yeah, sure, the money helped (stupid braces, dumb car insurance, silly college fund) but, my working and being away from my house, 4 days, every week, was putting a real strain on my house.

    "If only I had known, ahead of time."

    So, in a way, losing this job is really [gulp] a good thing.

    "I certainly wouldn't have offered you the hours!"

    Having to call the ladies I recently hired (like, just 2 or 3 weeks ago) and tell them that, you know, they are now, un-hired…not so much.

    "I'm really, really, sorry."

    In fact, way too much.

    "It's not your fault."

    I am (or, was) the manager (and I use the term very, very loosely) I sorta knew his business wasn't doing very well.  Still, I had such GREAT plans and worked really, really hard to keep his customers and employees happy.

    "I feel like SUCH an a**hole…"

    Man, un-hiring people really, really, does suck.  By Tuesday night, I was SO done.  I poured myself a glass of wine (i.e. turned the tap on the box) kicked the dog off the couch (sorry, Doofie) and just stared at the television.

    "I like you…I didn't start off liking you."

    Aaaand, then the part of the The Good Wife came on (see above clip) which made me think of an earlier conversation I had, with a longtime employee, who took pleasure in pointing out the stuff…I did wrong.

    "One of the machines is in the wrong place."

    Didn't matter if I re-arranged the ENTIRE gym (which, you're supposed to, once a month) without anyone's help and that she could have corrected it (her own self) right? 

    "You're not the a**hole, here, in fact, we ALL know you worked your a** off, Liz."

    Look, I'm not comparing myself to The Good Wife — that character is a lawyer and I am, well, you know — however, working lots of hours, being away from her kids and having to work EXTRA hard, feeling as if she has to prove herself, to EVERYONE, because she's a mom.

    [bites lower lip]

    Yeah, I felt her pain – still do – sort of.

    "Shouldn't HE be making these calls?"

    My poor husband, Garth [not his real name] what a good guy he is, really.

    "Why are YOU apologizing?"

    I mean, I already quit trying to be the best wife, or the perfect mother, years ago and he's seems to be okay with it.

    "Because, I am a good manager…DAMMIT!"

    Or, at least, I was — now, at least I can keep on pretending to be a good blogger/writer/whatever, right?

    [sound of crickets chirping]

    Sorry, I just can't seem to quit YOU…Internets…so, I guess you better start getting used to, you know, being stuck with me.

    You're welcome!

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • Wordless Wednesday
    Ocean’s Eleven

    Day 132 - Blue Boy

    Photograph courtesy of my 11 year-old son, who FINALLY aced his last math test and has a penchant for blue.

    What?  It was either a $9.00 bottle of color, or a new cell phone — yes, I am also ONE OF THOSE parents!

    Check out the Official Wordless Wednesday HQ
    Tag, you're it:   

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • No Business 4 Boyz

    Hope Wears Oprah Swag

    My 8 year-old is SUCH a free spirit and, unlike her sisters, is a bit of a Tomboy, as well (she gets that from me) and, well, being the youngest of 4, the survival instinct is strong with this one.

    "I wanna do the Lip Sync show, again!"

    Last year, her older sisters helped choreograph Hope and her friends in performing, "We Got the Beat" by the GoGos and, more importantly, I didn't have to do a gosh-darned thing, other than, you know, drive them to and from the show.

    "Am I picking your daughters up at school, or your house?"

    This year, however, I did even less.

    "I dunno?"

    Lip-sync-related stuff, I mean.

    "What time do we have to be there?"

    My father was scheduled for major surgery and, well, if you were to ask me a week ago, at this EXACT time, exactly what was on my mind, I would have said…uh…I dunno, what day is it, again?

    "The show starts at 7 o'clock!"

    However, by Friday they had kicked my dad out of the hospital (thank you for ALL the good thoughts, btw, they worked) and he's recovering, quite well.

    "Can't wait to see the show!"

    I was so ready for the week to be over, but had no clue what to expect, other than their act was based on the Risky Business dance scene, this Heidi Klum Guitar Hero commercial and one of my favorite episodes of The Nanny (you know, Fran Drescher…she tawks funny) and they called themselves, No Business 4 Boyz!

    They did a FABULOUS job, right (Hope is the cutey on the left) so, who's the boy?

    "What a good big brother you are!"

    Apparently, my oldest daughter bribed my 11 year-old son to play the part of the "boss man" (for the latest issue of his favorite wrestling magazine, I think) and extortion sorta runs in the family…here in Jersey, anyways.

    "I had to sit in a room full of screaming girls!"

    I'm sorta glad it's over, too.

    "I almost threw up."

    Aaaaand, I'm grateful that, as they get older, my kids really seem to enjoy helping each other out.

    "But, I just swallowed it and walked on stage."

    Mostly.

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • You Say Garbage, I Say, “GAH-BIDGE!”

    You Say Garbage, I Say GAH-BIDGE!

    I just love garbage men.  Okay, trash men.  Wait, waste collectors?  Oh, I know, sanitation engineers.  Or, maybe they're refuse removal technicians?

    Whatever.  

    My guys ALWAYS take a moment to place (not throw) my cans
    back onto the sidewalk (not my next door neighbor's lawn) and move out
    of the way, so that I can get passed them and into my driveway, on my
    way home from dropping the kids at school.

    Okay, let me repeat…THE GARBAGE TRUCK PULLS OVER TO ALLOW ME TO GET INTO MY DRIVEWAY…I love that!

    The dude driving in the sparkly new Mercedes SUV, while STILL talking on his cellphone, this morning, not so much.

    Or, maybe it was a Crossover (IDK) and he could have been just too busy discussing a very important business deal (I bet Donald Trump would pull over – if he drove his own car, I mean) either way, I guess expecting him to be nice would have been considered a luxury.

    [slams on breaks]

    "Move that piece of garbage!"

    A few hours (not to mention, about a thousand expletives) later and I'm still at a loss as to what would provoke such an extremely well tailored young man to act like a snot-nosed little booger.

    "UP YAWS, YUH BASSTED!!!"

    MY trash guys, however, are like the cream in my McCafe and they obviously don't take very kindly to acts of random assness, either (thanks, Trash Guy!) and, well, I am very happy to report that chivalry is NOT dead!

    "Yuh buhleeve that [expletive] guy?"

    [cringe]

    A little stinky…a bit crude, perhaps…but, then again, a little gah-bidge never hurt nobody, you know what I'm sayin?

    "Man, he's got a potty mouth!"

    [one beat, two beats]

    "But, our garbage man is real nice…right mommy?"

    There's a lesson in there, somewhere.

    "He's a sanitation engineer, Sweetie."

    Aaaaand, if you happen to find it, just throw it up on the curb, next to the cans, up there, okay?

    [beep]

    "UP YOURS!"

    Since, I'm probably STILL trying to make a left turn!

    "It's…UP YAWS…Sweetie!"

    Aaaand, teaching my kids proper diction…Jersey style!

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • Distorted, No Editing Required

    Day 123 - Raintorted

    Cross-posted at our 365 Day Project, taken with my cell phone, because my camera is borked.

    I broke my camera [pause for a moment of silence] it's sitting on the sideboard in our kitchen, right where I left it, after realizing that I could not get it to work, no matter how hard I pleaded with it.

    "Oh no…et, tu Kodak!!!"

    Although, my poor little red point and shoot is powering up (sort of) the lens opens and makes this terrible grinding noise, as it tries to focus on nothing and freezes with a gray-ish look on its screen and, well, I fear it is very nearly dead.

    I know how it feels, sort of.

    "Why are you crying?"

    Heck if I knew.

    "It's raindrops."

    I mean, yeah, I bought the darned thing with my birthday money, last year (nevermind, which one) then, there's the fact that Garth and I are working through another rough patch (okay, so, maybe this time, we've been rubbing each other the wrong way, like flipping sandpaper) still, there ARE worse things, right? 

    Like, a flash flood in Kentucky and Tennessee (some of my best blogging buddies live there) a failed car bombing attempt in NYC (real close to home, this one is) just to name a few HOLY HANNAH MONTANA moments that make me feel like a total asshat for shedding a tear (or, two) over a flipping camera, or a little rain.

    But, it's NOT just about the camera, or the rain.

    "Wow, it's pouring outside!"

    My dad is scheduled for more surgery, tomorrow (AGAIN!) and THIS time, he's scared…me, too.

    "Mom, look it!"

    I arranged for coverage at work (thank you, Jane!) and will probably be spending the night (with my parents house, NOT at work!)

    "Mom?"

    And was thinking about the eleventy other things that I had to do, this week and before school ends.

    "Mommy?"

    All of which required me to be somewhere else, other than home, or work and, well, I just wish that someone would hurry up and invent that cloning machine, already!

    "MOMMY!"

    [blink, blink]

    "Huh, now what do you need?"

    Judging by the look on my youngest daughter's face, a real nice birthday present, next month, would be nice — especially, to make up for drawing the short straw and the nearly nine years of putting up with me…as her mother.

    "Daddy's gonna drop me off at school tomorrow, right?"

    Oh yeah, I forgot.

    "Yep."

    Forget the clone, I've got Garth [not his real name] and, you bet your sweet tea, I'm keeping him!

    "He took the whole day off, too!"

    I know, right?

    "AWESOME…I hope it doesn't pour."

    Me, too!

    [click]

    "Cool picture!"

    No editing required, either.

    "Where's your camera?"

    [one beat, two beats]

    "Did you break it?"

    You know, and I almost forgot about my broken camera…ALMOST!

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • A Time For Us, Maybe, Sometime Soon, Text Me!

    Day 115 - Happy Birthday Garth [not his real name]

    My husband, Garth [not his real name] absolutely loved this edible arrangement he got from my brother and sister-in-law, for his birthday, last weekend.

    What did I give him?

    A reason to remember the beginning of his 47th year, here on earth, as perhaps one the worst mornings of his life — oh, and by the way, Happy Birthday!

    Yep, am I a ray of sunshine…or, what? 

    Don't answer that!  Honestly, I feel terrible about fighting…on…his…birthday…but, he followed me into the bathroom and, this time, it wasn't to see if I was using his razor (AGAIN!) in an attempt to save a layer of skin, or two.

    Mine and his.

    Long story, short (you're welcome) everything that NEEDED to be said, was and, well, turns out we both felt we were working too hard to try and please each other and, guess what?

    [one beat, two beats]

    All work and no play make for real unhappy parents and Garth [not his real name] was JUST as tired, burnt out and frustrated, as I was, go figure.

    "Let's not talk about it, anymore."

    Seriously, I really do know when to shut up…sometimes…and, well, it could have gotten worse.

    "Are you and daddy getting a divorce?"

    Aaaaand, it did…real fast…DANGIT…because, my 14 year-old was supposedly getting something from her bathroom and, well, it's certainly not her fault the walls in this house are really, really thin, and she accidently overheard OUR ENTIRE CONVERSATON, right?

    "That's none of your business!"

    [cue sunshine]

    Seriously, I really do know how to light up a room and, if I had to be real honest with myself (because, you know, I lie like a cheap rug) our lack of privacy is no one else's fault, but ours, I guess.

    Still, the bathroom is MY fortress of solitude, DANGIT!

    "We argue sometimes, that's all."

    We wiped our eyes, he vacuumed the rugs…what?  Our parents were coming over and, well, he IS secretly having an affair with our Dyson (I think) and, well, can you blame him?  I don't.  Deep down inside, I know that it will get better.  It HAS to.

    "Send me something sexy, from the waist down."

    Aaaaand, it did…real fast…THANKYOUVERYMUCH…because, my husband is really a funny guy…especially, when he text messages me…in the middle of doing laundry.

    I'm a sexy doofus!Happy Belated Birthday, you sexy beast!!!

    So, I sent him a little somethin-somethin and, well, we really do make a great pair; don'cha think?

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • NWF Mom Update: The Local Impact of Climate Change – Now, With More Itch!

    You know Emily McKhann, right?  Well, you should, because she and Cooper Monroe founded TheMotherhood.com and, yes, they ARE very, very smart. 

    How do I know?

    Well, personally, I've been working very closely with The Motherhood Creative for a long time, now (in Gemini years, anyway) and, quite frankly, I feel way smarter, already.

    [sound of crickets chirping]

    Aaaaanyway, Emily attended a lunch for DC bloggers (Amie Adams, Gayle Weiswasser, Diane MacEaachern), hosted by Jaime Matyas and her great team at the National Wildlife Federation to help them learn a little more about a few NWF programs.   

    Here's what Emily said:

    "The conversation came around to global warming
    and climate change and Jaime's staff talked about the local impact of
    global warming, and how we tend to think of it as being outside our
    day-to-day lives (it is global after all!), but that really, we're seeing big changes all around us." 

    Then, her email made me itch:

    "Poison ivy, deer ticks, fire ants are all getting much worse, and
    we can expect the yucky, biting Asian mosquito to arrive some day soon."

    Awwwwwwwesome, right?  

    [scratch…scratch…scratch]

    Thanks for that, Emily.  Still.  I was very interested in learning simple little ways in which my family can help cut our global warming pollution and, hopefully, become more energy efficient…yes…from right here in Jersey.

    Here's a quick recap of what I found out, thanks to Emily's post, without the itch (you're welcome!):

    • Plant shade trees: The Department of Energy says planting three trees strategically around your home to block the sun in summer and wind in winter can reduce your annual heating and cooling costs by an average of 40 percent. [TFH:  DONE!]
    • Become a Green Tag subscriber: Many states now offer options for homeowners to buy electricity from clean, renewable sources such as wind, solar and biomass that produce little or no global warming pollution. Green energy can also be purchased through the National Wildlife Federation by visiting www.nwf.org/energy[TFH:  My husband, Garth (not his real name) is looking into renewable energy incentive programs in New Jersey and ways in which to help us find a way to decrease the initial amount of $$$$ required, upfront…PHEW!]
    • Act locally: Contact your mayor and ask that (s)he sign the U.S. Mayors Climate Protection Agreement, committing your city or town to meet or beat the global warming pollution reductions outlined in the Kyoto Protocol.  [TFH:  On the "honey do list," too!]

    Aaaaand, if that ain't enough for ya's (I'm goin' all Joisey on ya's…YO!) here's a link to NWF's global warming page: http://www.nwf.org/Global-Warming.aspx

    Here's their page listing the impact of climate change by state: http://www.nwf.org/Global-Warming/In-Your-State.aspx

    Aaaaand Emily's posthttp://beenthere.typepad.com/been_there/2010/04/the-closetohome-impact-of-global-warming.html

    Rock on with your bad itchy-self, Emily…YO!

    [FWIW:  Emily and I are Founding Mothers of NWF's Be Out There program
    – just helping families (like mine) get their kids outside and enjoy
    nature, more – no payment was received for this blog post.]

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.

  • Everybody Was Fast Food Fighting…HAH!

    I came home from dropping the kids off at school, this morning (a.k.a. the land of the carpool lanes from h.e.double.hockey.sticks) and found this propped up against one of the kitchen chairs.

    TFH Chore List

    My poor husband, Garth [not his real name] obviously, he's sick (and tired) of coming home and, well, let's just say, the kids have developed a bad case of daddy deafness and, sadly, showing signs of dain bramage, too.

    "Pick up your clothes…what clothes…the clothes that are lying in front of your bed…what bed…"

    [cue head explosion]

    It's amazing, really, how quickly, a person's head can explode, I mean.

    The ironic thing about all this is NOW I am the one…sitting in the driveway…just waiting, for whenever I think it's safe to come into the house, or until daddy's head explodes.

    "Hi…um…what's for dinner?"

    [three, two, one]

    "HOT DOGS, OKAY?!?!?!?"

    Absolutely. 

    "Mmmmmm, sounds good!"

    Relax.  They were 100% beef.  Still.  I thought it would be fun to write a little song about fast food (i.e. better than doing the laundry) because, you know SOMEONE is bound fight me on this one:

    (more…)

  • Parenting Tip #2,100,382:
    Always Learn the Rules, So You Can Break Them Properly

    Lama Lama

    I'm a BIG believer in Karma — what comes around goes around, you get what you give and all that — it's simple, easy to remember and exactly the sort of logic required, to help ward off a sixth sense for getting myself into trouble,.

    In other words, I am very capable of making an asshat out of myself, without anyone's help…thankyouverymuch, Mr. Dalai Lama!

    For example:  Wednesday – I wrote a post, on my shopping blog, about raising free spirits and teaching my girls to embrace their own sense of style.

    KARMA…KARMA…KARMA…BAM!

    Then, yesterday morning, I got home, saw the red light blinking on the answering machine and thought about, you know, ignoring it.

    I mean, it could have been HGTV.

    "Congratulations, you've been chosen as the winner of Green Home 2010!"

    Probably not.

    "Uh, hi, Mom, it's me, Glen…"

    [wince]

    "…um…well…uh…I'm in the principal's office…"

    Seriously?

    "…I got in trouble for wearing my wrestling t-shirt."

    Yesterday, my son was sent to the principal's office for "inappropriate" attire and, well, I kinda, sorta KNEW that he was breaking the dress code and, you know, sent him to school, anyway.

    "Are they gonna let you wear
    that shirt?"

    I wish I could say it was a rebellious need to question the school's authority in deciding what my kids should eat, drink and/or wear — although, I sometimes do think folks are getting a little, you know, militant about that sort of stuff — rather than, admit it was a simple attack of mommy brain.

    "Yeah, I wore it to school lots of times."

    Honestly, I guess I was just feeling really tired of arguing (ALL THE TIME) and, well, we were already late for our carpool.

    "Fine."

    Besides, it's about time my kids started accepting responsibility for their actions and, well, maybe even I can learn how to quit blaming myself, for every little thing they do wrong, right?

    [beep]

    Odd.  He hung up.  Oh, well…look, there's another message…maaaaaaaybe…

    "Um…I forgot…you need to come to school and bring me a new shirt!"

    D'oh…shuddup Dalai Lama…stupid HGTV!,

    Liz@thisfullhouse signature

    © 2010 This Full House - All Rights Reserved.