Category: Extreme Home-Do-Over

The Money Shot
My mother-in-law gave me simply the best compliment, yesterday.

"Your house is always so warm and inviting."

Seeing that it is basically held together with spit and Elmer's glue. Seriously, having tacked up the loose wallpaper on Thanksgiving Eve, I am not even kidding.

Stupid Hurricane Irene!

So, besides telling me that I look way thinner, it really was the nicest thing you could say to me, at the moment.

"I just don't have your energy, anymore."

What do you say to that? To a woman who, as long as I've known her and even way before then, has loved the holidays best?

In my head, I was thinking all of the possible responses (and this would be a real good time to thank goodness you are not in my head) like:
- Well, I am, like what, 40 years younger than you?
- Yes, but you should see me tomorrow morning?
- Did I mention, you are much older than I am?
Instead, I promised to help my mother-in-law put out some of her Christmas decorations, today.

"But, why do I have to go?"

Much to the dismay of my 12 year-old son.

"It would make her happy and I said so."

Because, I'm good with the reasoning like that.

Although he would never admit it (out loud) that is totally my son's, "Yeah, you were right, Mom" face.

I texted my middle girl this photo, who stayed home to rest (stupid migraines!) and honestly, we had SUCH a great time.

Then, on the way home, my son hollered, leaving me slightly deaf in my right ear.

"QUICK! Pull over, Mom!!"

In my head, I was thinking all of the possible reasons why (yadda, yadda) finally deciding that, having just passed some major roadkill, I had indeed waited too long to feed the boy.

Turns out, he just thought the sky was too awesome NOT to stop and take a closer look.

Aaaaand, he was right. It really was one of the prettiest sunsets I have ever seen.

But, this? Being able to see his warm and happy expression, right through the shadows? In my opinion, it is the money shot.

And, to think, we almost missed it, if it weren't for one simple little compliment.

Thanks, Mom!

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

I'm NaBloPoMo-ing it, this month (first time NaBloPoMo-er) feel free to check out what I've NaBloPoMo-ed, thus far (PHEW!) and let me know how I'm doing (I mean, 30 posts, in 30 days, really?!?) when you have time, of course!

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November 25, 2011
The Big-ish Reveal

12 cups of coffee, 6 trips to Home Depot and way too many potty stops I'd care to mention, at the moment (you're welcome!)

Before: last Thursday, when the wallpaper fell on my head and I vowed, before the bathroom gods and my neighbors, "NO MORE WALLPAPER, EVUH!"

Having spent most of Friday, Saturday and today working on it, I am proud to confirm that my spontaneous bathroom makeover is indeed FINISHED. ON BUDGET. AAAAND, ON SCHEDULE.

Wanna see? To quote my friend Busy Mom, it's time to "move that bus!"

(more…)

November 20, 2011
Under the Wire (Alternate Title: Nearly Forgot to #NaBloPoMo)

Well, my spontaneous bathroom makeover is finished (mostly) and I keep suprising the heck out of myself, by achieving a whole new level of tired, from when I first started this project 3 days ago.

This morning, I posted a sneak peek on Facebook. The color is actually a lot less yellow in person and looks more like lightly toasted, um, toast.

Here's the really cool part: being pressed for time, I came up with a way to cover up all the imperfections (i.e. wallpapering over sheetrock is NOT a good idea) I texturized (yes, it's a word!) the wall to make it look like stone.

In fact, my husband Garth (NHRN) was SO impressed (okay, more like shocked) that he treated me to a new light fixture.

BONUS!

Quite frankly, I am very proud of myself. Not only did I actually finish a home project (for once) it looks REAL gosh-darned good, too.

Also, I'm considering submitting my name to the Guinness Book of World Records for person with the most paint stuck, in places a person shouldn't have paint stuck.

Slightly related: My youngest daughter has a friend sleeping over tonight who, during dinner, seemed a bit alarmed at the amount of paint still splattered on the back of my hands.

"Is it going to stay like that forever?!?"

Yes, I will be forever classic taupe.

"I'll just connect the dots and tell people it's a Henna tattoo."

[sound of crickets, chirping]

BURRRRRRRRP!

"Good one, Mom."

Parenting Tip #29,188,299: When all else fails, burp REAL LOUD!

What?!? Pictures?!? Oh, yeah, I'm going to post the AFTER pictures tomorrow, when Garth (NHRN) promised to mount my prettiful new light fixture.

Heaven knows I could do with some more blog fodder: stupid #NaBloPoMo!

Until then, I remain forever yours,

I.M. Tired

P.S. I said mount (HAH!)

[Progress Report: having nearly painted myself into a coronary on Friday (stupid #NaBloPoMo) it's the big-ish reveal!!]

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

I'm NaBloPoMo-ing it, this month (first time NaBloPoMo-er) feel free to check out what I've NaBloPoMo-ed, thus far (PHEW!) and let me know how I'm doing (I mean, 30 posts, in 30 days, really?!?) when you have time, of course!

^{Feed me, see more!}

November 19, 2011
Painting Myself Into a Coronary

Yesterday, I spontaneously started de-constructing our bathroom and, even though we've used other people's half-bathrooms that were WAY BIGGER (hrmph) when it comes to prepping walls for paint, size does NOT matter.

Every part of my body, even the parts that I forgot I even had, hurts.

About halfway through I was all, like, what was I thinking?!? I should of used a little Elmer's glue, some duct tape, perhaps sprinkled a little holy water and called it a day.

Look, it's Frankenshower!

Playing with painter's tape, however, IS AWESOME!!! In fact, I may or may not have been a little overzealous with taping the shower.

3 cups of coffee, 2 coats of primer (ceiling and walls, each) and 4 trips to the OTHER bathroom later, I've spent a total of 8 hours on this last minute project and was totally excited about being "this close" to being finished.

Until, all those little imperfections previously ignored (ahem) started bleeding through.

I have until this weekend to get this finished and seeing as I've pretty much painted myself into a corner (bah-dum-bum) a 3rd trip to Home Depot (today) and I'm pretty sure I've come up with a solution.

Tomorrow, we paint (and by we, I mean me) and, hopefully, I'll be able to show you the results in a lovely side-by-side, before-and-after shot, with my next post.

Only if it, you know, comes out good, of course.

In the meantime, if anyone needs me, I'll be upstairs, avoiding HGTV, the DYI Channel and fending off a coronary.

Stupid old house, dumbass wallpaper.

[Progress Report: coming just under the wire, late Saturday night (stupid #NaBloPoMo) my spontaneous bathroom makeover is complete!!]

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

I'm NaBloPoMo-ing it, this month (first time NaBloPoMo-er) feel free to check out what I've NaBloPoMo-ed, thus far (PHEW!) and let me know how I'm doing (I mean, 30 posts, in 30 days, really?!?) when you have time, of course!

^{Feed me, see more!}

November 18, 2011
NO MORE WALLPAPER, EVUH!!!

So, there I was, just sitting, reading the latest issue of Cottage Living and minding my own (ahem) business, when, all of the sudden, RRRRRRRRIIIIIIPPPPP.

Aaaaaand, at about 10:30 this morning, something snapped and I went all Mommy Dearest, right there, in the middle of, well, you know.

Really?!? As if the crumpling ceiling and leaky walls in the living room, not to mention the mysterious black hole, forming on the ceiling above the washer and dryer, as we speak, weren't enough (stupid Irene) then again, who the heck wallpapers a bathroom, right?!?

Riiiiiiight.

4 hours, 2 cups of coffee and 3 trips to the OTHER bathroom, later.

A good day's work, eh? Tomorrow, we prime (and by we, I mean me) and I hope to be able to wrap up my extreme bathroom makeover by this weekend.

Why, yes, of course I remember that Thanksgiving is only, like, 7 sleeps away. Because, we're hosting an intimate dinner for 12 (so far) and, although the rest of the house maybe a shambles (stupid Irene) the bathroom/library is going to look mah-vuh-luss, dagnabit.

Oh and NO MORE WALLPAPER, EVUH!!!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go and find Garth (NHRN) because, I seem to have lost my ass somewhere in between the hallway and dinner.

Stupid wallpaper, dumbass Irene.

[Progress Report: having nearly painted myself into a coronary on Friday and then coming under the wire, late Saturday night (stupid #NaBloPoMo) my spontaneous bathroom makeover is complete!!]

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

I'm NaBloPoMo-ing it, this month (first time NaBloPoMo-er) feel free to check out what I've NaBloPoMo-ed, thus far (PHEW!) and let me know how I'm doing (I mean, 30 posts, in 30 days, really?!?) when you have time, of course!

^{Feed me, see more!}

November 17, 2011
Further Proof Our Life IS a Sitcom
Or, Would Make a Very Comical Cartoon

Backstory: Hurricane Irene ripped us a new one (figuratively and literally) damaging our roof and chimney, which now causes our ceilings and the front of our house to leak like a sieve, every time it rains.

Flashback: to September, which, turns out, was one of the stormiest months we've ever had, here in Jersey (of course!)

Flash-forward: last night, my awesome friend Sue (who also happens to be my next door neighbor, in my dreams, I wish) Facebook's me while I'm out buying lottery tickets.

Missed it (DAGNABIT!) so, through the magic of the interwebs, I go and watch the episode this morning:

Sorry about the 15 second ad in the beginning (ABC folks gotta keep their lights on, too, I guess) the clip itself is only 30 seconds long and a gosh-darned good example of what it's like to live in our house, when EVERY TIME IT RAINS!!!

Now, if you'll excuse me, the clouds are beginning to roll in.

If anyone needs me, I'll be in the kitchen. Breaking out the pots and hoping that the insurance check clears and/or ABC calls, sometime, soon!

Stupid roof, dumbass Irene.

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

October 20, 2011
Why Worry When You Can Confuse the Forces of Evil, Instead?!?

A lot of stuff has been going on, here at Casa de Stinky. What?!? You, too?!? DANG, when will it EVER end, right?!?

Aaaaanyway, in an effort to not think about stuff (stinky as it is) I tend to move things around.

Like, oh, I don't know, shifting chairs, hanging curtains, taking down and rehanging pictures, you know, the little things that require very little physical effort, almost no financial backing or filing of anymore loan applications (UGH!) simple little stuff that just sort of makes me want to, you know, smile.

Aaaaand, confuses the forces of evil into thinking: OUCH!…hey, when DID this bookcase get here…didn't we JUST trip over it, in the garage…and LOOK…in and out bins…really…SHE'S GOT BINS…heh, and a coat rack…good luck with that one, right?!?

[smiling]

Still, she IS smiling…so, I guess, we best be moving on then, eh…wanna go cause some havoc in the garage, then?!?

I know, I know, it goes against ALL things Fen Shui (DAGNABIT!) but, as of this week, every corner of my house is officially FULL of stuff and, yet, I somehow find myself gravitating to this one, throughout the day.

I like to think of it as a little nook of inspiration, decorated simply with my latest dollar store finds and flanked on the right by a picture of my grandmother, someone who my kids adored and miss, very, very much.

Me, too.

Also, see how the geraniums in the window are reflected in the photograph? They were my OTHER grandmother's favorite flower. So, yeah, weird, right?

Yes, my house is small. No, we still don't have any idea when we'll EVER get the stupid chimney fixed, or ceiling, for that matter, oh and the front door is STILL leaking, GAH!

This. THIS! It's what my kids and I will see, every morning. The first place we'll come to and drop our stuff (hopefully) at the end of each day.

"Oh no, I forgot my speech!"

My 10 year-old is running for student council president and, well, she also dreams of being an archaeologist, a scientist, or yoga instructor (???) whatever.

"It's in the dining room."

Well, at least she knew EXACTLY where it was, so there's that, right? RIGHT?!?

[sound of crickets]

Riiiiight.

"I read it to Mamama, last night."

[smiling]

Enough said.

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

October 12, 2011
Nearly WordlessWednesday:
Same, Only Different

Source: houzz.com via Liz on Pinterest

Now this, THIS IS EXACTLY what my dining room looks like, here at home.

Minus the nice walls, finished ceilings, those wickedly awesome French doors and fancy furniture, that rug and gorgeous light fixture, WOW, oh and, at second glance, uhhhhh, our floor may or may not look a little less, you know, finished.

Ummmm, did I mention, we have the same color pallet, tho?!?

Stupid houzz!

© 2003 – 2011 This Full House

September 21, 2011
#Reverb10: Action

Reverb 10 is an online initiative created by Gwen Bell to reflect on 2010, consider, you know, what’s next and, through daily writing prompts, help folks (like me) share their story.

Since I am ALL about sharing (shuddup Garth, not your real name!) my friend Shannon is doing it and now Diana’s joining in (although, the non-conformist in me can’t promise to, you know, write daily) I’ve decided to give it a whirl.

Today’s prompt: Action — when it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?

Oh wow, great, well this one’s easy (NOT!!!!) because, I’ve got SO MANY ideas rolling around in my head, right now.

Home projects I’ve made happen and have YET to, you know, finish.

Working (REAL HARD) and ridding myself of ALL that unproductive self-doubt I believe keeps writers (like me) from succeeding even further.

Although, taking care of 6 people, living in a 7 room house, will do that to a person (Ty Pennington, WHERE ARE YOU?!?)

No, it’s NOT about the ideas, or necessarily about making them happen, either (been there, done that) for me, the next step(s) in 2011 would be to:

Continue writing (i.e. blogging) the only way I know how, long before professing honesty and integrity was, you know, cool.

Maybe, even finish that book I started a couple of years ago (even though it feels like everybody’s writing a book these days, really AWESOME stuff, too, right?) but, this one’s a little different, as well!

Rinse ALL doubt from my mind (mostly)

Instead, focus on the ideas that inspire me and, hopefully, help me see those reluctant little aspirations of mine a little clearer — not to mention, through, to the end.

Repeat

Until then, I remain aspiringly yours,

A. Dork

My OTHER Reverb 10 stories.

December 13, 2010