The Husband Wish List

I was collating through paperwork and alphabetizing color-coded files, the other day.

Okay, so I was looking for a pen.

Fiiiiiine, I would have been happy finding a broken crayon…but, couldn’t see the top of my desk from the paper jungle that mysteriously cropped up…seems like overnight, really.

Alriiiiiight, so a person could lose a small child in the stack of bills, that somehow magically migrated from the kitchen table…ummmmmm…what?

[sound of crickets]

PEN!!!…that’s right…I was looking for a pen (or crayon) but, found a list of stuff and asked my youngest daughter about it, since, you know, it was in her handwriting.

“It’s a list of stuff.”

Now that we’re clear on it being a list…of stuff…she went on to explain that it is actually a collective wish list she and her sisters penned, while I was away at BlogHer, of the qualities they wanted in their future husband and/or SigOth.

In the order listed (with notes added, where deemed necessary, or, at least, I felt, you know, compelled to do so, as their Muh-thuh) and YES! I asked them before I blogged it, for the sake of posterity, of course:

• Funny (Heh, guys hate this, right?!?)
• Loving
• Caring
• Good attitude
• Wants to have kids (Really? Hrmph. Go figure.)
• Tall
• A Little Older (My oldest has a little crush on the “Stay Thirsty, My Friends,” dude, me too!)
• Australian (With the likes of Hugh Jackman, can you blame them?)
• Any accent (Come to think of it…Mike Holmes…aye?!?)
• Great personality
• Hugger (It’s how we roll!)
• Dancer/singer/male model/body building (I kid you not, with forward slash and everything!)
• Lots of money (I guess they thought better about it!)
• Helps read to children (Preferably can read on their own, too, I hope!)
• Nice abs (SNORT!)
• Love to bake and cook
• Pretty eyes (It’s what attracted me to their father, that and his nice abs, really!)
• Toned (Because, sometimes nice abs are just not enough, you know?)
• Good teeth (Or, at least, hope that one of your sisters or brother marries a dentist!)
• Animal lover
• Smooth voice (Why, yes, I do happen to own a collection of Barry White albums, why do you ask?)
• Artistic
• Sporty
• Bond with the kids
• Strong

[pause for bathroom break]

• Willing to take responsibility and take care of family when sick
• Photographer
• Traveler (Aaaaand, hopefully, take you with him, just sayin’)
• Some chest hair (SNORT!)
• Whiskers (Less cat-like and more of the Johnny Depp-ish, I think!)
• Confident
• Flirty (Smart girls!)
• Loves me for me (Word!)
• Doesn’t smoke or do drugs (See previous parenthesis.)
• Loves the beach/the ocean/the capes (i.e. Cape Cod and Cape May.)
• Construction worker (To build his/her mother-in-law her dream house, FINALLY, preferably on either one of the Capes, doesn’t matter which, really, I’m easy like that!)

It will be fun to visit this list, a few years from now and see how we they fared (or, not!) right?!?

Riiiiiiight.

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