I’m not one for giving parenting advice – not being able to follow simple instructions and accused of being less than cooperative, myself ownself - but, sometimes I find myself in the position of having to either agree, disagree or strongly suggest that a person teach their child to use phones, properly!
[phone rings]
“Is Thing One there?”
Silence.
“Hello?”
[clearing throat]
“Yes?”
[cough]
“Um…is Thing One, there?”
Silence.
“Hello, can you hear me?”
[sigh]
“Yes…but, who am I speaking to?”
[hestating even more]
“Um…oh…this is So-and-So.”
Silence.
“Hello?”
[hesitating]
“Yes?”
[heavy sigh]
“Oh, I get it…okay…um…hello Thing One’s Mom…this is So-and-So…may I pleeeeze speak with Thing One?!?!”
[even heavier sigh]
“No, I’m sorry…Thing One is sick and can’t come to the phone, right now – perhaps you can try again, tomorrow?”
[click]
What?
It’s Monday, the kids and I were all sick this weekend and she should feel damned lucky I answered the phone in the first place, trust me – feeling and looking as I do, right now – you’ll thank me, later!
Next week: Teaching your kids the fine art of puking in the toilet and other random crap from a mommy on the edge of jumping the couch!
Comments
18 responses to “Because I’m older, wiser and probably have way more stretch marks than you, too!”
It took my daughter some time to figure out that it was a good idea to identify herself when calling for a friend… and to say “please,” “thank you” and “goodbye” when ending the call.
I’m sorry you’re all still feeling sick! Get better soon!
It took my daughter some time to figure out that it was a good idea to identify herself when calling for a friend… and to say “please,” “thank you” and “goodbye” when ending the call.
I’m sorry you’re all still feeling sick! Get better soon!
It took my daughter some time to figure out that it was a good idea to identify herself when calling for a friend… and to say “please,” “thank you” and “goodbye” when ending the call.
I’m sorry you’re all still feeling sick! Get better soon!
Don’t do it! Don’t jump off the couch!
That was my biggest pet peeve when my brother was younger. I’d call from college and he had NO PHONE MANNERS even though he got a lecture EVERY SINGLE TIME HE ANSWERED THE PHONE without doing it properly. It’s like his brain didn’t understand the concept that manners also extend to phone usage. *sigh*
I still tease him. Oh, to be the oldest.
Don’t do it! Don’t jump off the couch!
That was my biggest pet peeve when my brother was younger. I’d call from college and he had NO PHONE MANNERS even though he got a lecture EVERY SINGLE TIME HE ANSWERED THE PHONE without doing it properly. It’s like his brain didn’t understand the concept that manners also extend to phone usage. *sigh*
I still tease him. Oh, to be the oldest.
Don’t do it! Don’t jump off the couch!
That was my biggest pet peeve when my brother was younger. I’d call from college and he had NO PHONE MANNERS even though he got a lecture EVERY SINGLE TIME HE ANSWERED THE PHONE without doing it properly. It’s like his brain didn’t understand the concept that manners also extend to phone usage. *sigh*
I still tease him. Oh, to be the oldest.
I’m so not ready for the phone calls from friends. My oldest is 4 and is already on us daily about getting her ears pierced. GAH!
Hope you and the kids feel better pronto.
I’m so not ready for the phone calls from friends. My oldest is 4 and is already on us daily about getting her ears pierced. GAH!
Hope you and the kids feel better pronto.
I’m so not ready for the phone calls from friends. My oldest is 4 and is already on us daily about getting her ears pierced. GAH!
Hope you and the kids feel better pronto.
It seems like such a simple thing, doesn’t it? And yet, like so many seemingly simple things, we Americans are notoriously bad at doing them right. I’ve been annoying my daughter’s friends for eons now (she’s nearly fourteen), and they still can’t manage to identify themselves when they call.
Can’t wait for your advice on toilet-puking training. Feel better soon!
It seems like such a simple thing, doesn’t it? And yet, like so many seemingly simple things, we Americans are notoriously bad at doing them right. I’ve been annoying my daughter’s friends for eons now (she’s nearly fourteen), and they still can’t manage to identify themselves when they call.
Can’t wait for your advice on toilet-puking training. Feel better soon!
It seems like such a simple thing, doesn’t it? And yet, like so many seemingly simple things, we Americans are notoriously bad at doing them right. I’ve been annoying my daughter’s friends for eons now (she’s nearly fourteen), and they still can’t manage to identify themselves when they call.
Can’t wait for your advice on toilet-puking training. Feel better soon!
Funny thing is, I have my daughter well trained with her manners. TheWife on the other hand I am still working on. It drives her nuts when I won’t do what she asks while awaiting a “Please or Thank you”
For the most part my daughter is unfortunately well versed with the toilet puking, although she sometimes forgets and heads for the sink.
I leave that for my wife. (Her punishment for not using please and thank you 😉 )
Get Well Soon wishes all around!
Funny thing is, I have my daughter well trained with her manners. TheWife on the other hand I am still working on. It drives her nuts when I won’t do what she asks while awaiting a “Please or Thank you”
For the most part my daughter is unfortunately well versed with the toilet puking, although she sometimes forgets and heads for the sink.
I leave that for my wife. (Her punishment for not using please and thank you 😉 )
Get Well Soon wishes all around!
Funny thing is, I have my daughter well trained with her manners. TheWife on the other hand I am still working on. It drives her nuts when I won’t do what she asks while awaiting a “Please or Thank you”
For the most part my daughter is unfortunately well versed with the toilet puking, although she sometimes forgets and heads for the sink.
I leave that for my wife. (Her punishment for not using please and thank you 😉 )
Get Well Soon wishes all around!
OMG I know how you feel! I just ahte bad phone etiquette in general. I have a few years before I have to deal with the kids on the phone.
I’ll be RIGHT there to whoop my kids’ friend’s butts if/when they talk stupid.
OMG I know how you feel! I just ahte bad phone etiquette in general. I have a few years before I have to deal with the kids on the phone.
I’ll be RIGHT there to whoop my kids’ friend’s butts if/when they talk stupid.
OMG I know how you feel! I just ahte bad phone etiquette in general. I have a few years before I have to deal with the kids on the phone.
I’ll be RIGHT there to whoop my kids’ friend’s butts if/when they talk stupid.